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OK, a friend has visited, and after they leave you notice they have put a new roll of TP on the bathroom holder. That's nice, you think to yourself.
Then you notice: It is on BACKWARDS!
Do you:
Not even notice such things?
Do nothing?
Take it out and turn it around?
Find that taking it out has left it lumpy and unround, so take it out again and discard it and install new roll?
Do nothing, but every time you use TP you seethe with fury. However the next time you change it, you put it on backwards again, just to show yourself that you can be flexible, it is not a big deal, doesn't really matter to me, la dee da... But the NEXT time you put it on correctly, and are toying with the idea of putting the spare TP into a locked cabinet, so the whole messy affair doesn't get repeated?
Put a little diagram next to the holder, detailing the correct method of mounting?
Remove the TP holder altogether and put the roll on the nearby cabinet?
Draw an outline with magic marker where the TP is to be placed?
Decide that the magic marker looks tacky and put down a doily with double stick tape?
Write on the doily with magic marker explaining that the TP is to be placed there?
Decide to poll your friends, and spend an hour crafting a note to them?
Realize you only have one friend who will understand the problem?
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<br />This work is licensed under a
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OK, a friend has visited, and after they leave you notice they have put a new roll of TP on the bathroom holder. That's nice, you think to yourself.
Then you notice: It is on BACKWARDS!
Do you:
Not even notice such things?
Do nothing?
Take it out and turn it around?
Find that taking it out has left it lumpy and unround, so take it out again and discard it and install new roll?
Do nothing, but every time you use TP you seethe with fury. However the next time you change it, you put it on backwards again, just to show yourself that you can be flexible, it is not a big deal, doesn't really matter to me, la dee da... But the NEXT time you put it on correctly, and are toying with the idea of putting the spare TP into a locked cabinet, so the whole messy affair doesn't get repeated?
Put a little diagram next to the holder, detailing the correct method of mounting?
Remove the TP holder altogether and put the roll on the nearby cabinet?
Draw an outline with magic marker where the TP is to be placed?
Decide that the magic marker looks tacky and put down a doily with double stick tape?
Write on the doily with magic marker explaining that the TP is to be placed there?
Decide to poll your friends, and spend an hour crafting a note to them?
Realize you only have one friend who will understand the problem?
<a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/3.0/us/">
<img alt="Creative Commons License" style="border-width:0" src="http://i.creativecommons.org/l/by-nc-nd/3.0/us/88x31.png" />
</a>
<br />This work is licensed under a
<a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/3.0/us/">Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License</a>.
Last night i dreamed i was at a group function with 16 or 20 peeps. big kinda dark place, suddenly we were to pair up and swap clothes. we were all a little surprised - swap underwear too??? Yes, this was an exercise about putting yourself in another's place and seeing their points of views. Pretty strange.
shades of being last picked for dodge ball. i could find no one not paired, and finally raised my hand and called out. the only person unpaired was a sour looking woman. she didn't want to swap underwear, and disappeared. Other folks played with little stickers they put on their hands and had fun.
I could be good at clearing a library’s kid’s 'story time' by telling how “I was attacked by a shark, this long scar is where he took the first bite to see if I was tasty or old chum.”
<Here a short digression into the horrors of chum.>
“And this scar is where he tried to bite my head off, but missed and instead ripped open my chest. To force him to let go I pushed my swimming goggles up his nose, which really made him cross. He swam in a circle around me for about 15 minutes, though it felt like an hour, all the while looking at me with evil in his eyes and goggles in his nose. Then he <dramatic pause> <in a VERY LOUD voice> swooped in and chomped off my leg!”
<at this point I stand up and lift my leg free of my prosthetic, which clatters to the floor. I move my arms in imitation of a giant mouth, fingers for teeth, and make "Aaaarrrrgggg" sounds as I pan across the room. Of course, having only one leg, I immediately fall over, no doubt into a folding chair that makes a crash and adds to the pandemonium.>
At this point the children run screaming from the room with their arms held high and hands flapping, screaming “Ahhhhhhh”. Worried mothers peek around the door…
Sheer beauty.
c 2007 Deborah Bolle
N.B.: The description of my body is accurate, but the description of how it got that way is not.
